Some of you may be wondering why anyone would bother with natural birthing if hospitals provide drugs to prevent the pain of labor. It is a question that makes perfect sense to me, but I don't want to make my decision based solely on pain. If pain was all that labor was about, then all women would opt for an epidural. So the question for me is why would women go through such pain? Is it a rite of passage for some? Is is a test of strength and stamina? I am not sure. I am sure that everyone has their own reasons, but I am trying to find mine.
It fascinates me that God has created bodies to reproduce. And not just to reproduce, but has given the body everything it needs before, during and after pregnancy. The fact that our bodies secrete certain hormones at certain times for certain purposes blows my mind. It is so mysterious.
I have been reading a birthing book called Birthing From Within, that includes art exercises to help women identify their fears and misconceptions about pregnancy (It is a little dated and dogmatic but I really enjoy the artistic side). After doing these art exercises, my most consistent fear was that I would be consumed in the pain and that God would not be present, that He/She would leave me. I know that there is plenty of scripture that dispels this fear but I was trying to identify what lurked in my gut.
A few nights after those exercises I woke up in the middle of the night and felt the baby kicking for one of the first times. I sensed God's presence like I hadn't in a long time. It was like God was reassuring me that His/Her presence would be with me in this time. Not only just in labor, but even as this adorable baby is being knitted together in my womb.